As a Jewl of Gold in a Swine’s Snout
Examination of Ann Pudeator, Murthering Midwiffe—July 2, 1692
Birth is a resky acte froght w’th apprehenson. I have bond this woeman to this erth through the care of my voyce and my hends. I keep twenty oyls, salvs, and greas packd in jarrs. Oyl of wenged antes sunk in four tymes their weit of sweete oyl, left for fortey days in the sunne. Skull moss against bleding. Human bone meal, a special kinde of purification. Human bloode swallowd “freshh and hott” for strengt and vitality; or dryed, powdered, or distelled. Cannibalism mor or less the ordir of the day. Groaning cake and groaning beer. Women, gather here and darken the room, seal the entrance, blocke the keyhol with the twest of a ragge. Apply frankincense oyl under the nos to induce a sneze. Let the woeman be led around the house slowly. No men sanctioned in this roome, no men peering behind the scenes at these wicked deds, no man stabbing his witch doghter with a sworde as she mekes her brother disappear from one sid of the bredge and reappear on the other. In the blinke of an eeye. They say a byrd entered my hous and shortly after I exited the doore, the same entitey. I am deth come to seek your childran, a divel’s delivary. The frut of abortion, an eraser consperacy. Unexplienable deth is explienable throu me. Lif and deth walkk hend in hend through the longge nit of my watch. With charms I transfur labour pains from the moether to the dog at her fet. I carry off the placenta, umbilical cord, and caul, steal the bye-products of birth to concoct floating oyntments, eat whychynges with my friends in the sabbath. The part of my brain said to contain memry is full of these thengs. The acte of geving birth strips a mother of her Christianity and I entice her to my coven with lastful lookes and swet whysperynges. THEREFOR, woemen’s wombs must become public domaine. Malleus Maleficarum (The Hammer of Witches), published on the ev of Columbus’ voyage, lists resons why witchcraft is a female crym, why handreds of thousands of woemen must be tryed, torturd, burnd aliv or hanged for wetchcraft:
1. When a woeman thinks alone, she thinks evil.
2. She’s receptive to the influence of invisable sols.
3. Slippary tongus.
4. Anable to conceil from fellow-woemen what they knoww.
5. The ferst temptress, Eve, and her imitators.
6. Intellectually like chuldren.
7. As a jewl of gold in a swine’s snout, so is a beaotiful
woeman withot judgement.
8. More carnal than a sensual man.
9. A defect in the formation of the first woeman formed
from a bent rib, so unlik the direction of a man.
10. A weeping woman weaves a snar.
I am the treasur house of reproductiv knowledge. On the pretixt of keping the newborne warm, I carry it out the roome, lift it, and surrender it to the Prince of the Air. A chuld’s armme falls out my garment. I am a conduit between worlds, no matter the directon.
